A World Alone
by marinaandthedorks
Summary: When she left her home in Norway for an internship at the CDC in Atlanta, Helena never would have thought that something like a zombie apocalypse was possible. The 26 year old student decides to stay at the CDC, willing to sacrifice herself in order to generate a cure to this horrifying disease. [Daryl x OC]
1. Chapter 1

The ash brown hair was blown into her face while the Atlanta heat was gently stroking her cheeks. She sighed and looked around, trying to spot the cab that was supposed to pick her up from the airport. _Nervous_. She felt nervous. After all, this was only her second year of her medical laboratory science study, and to be able to do an internship at the CDC was kind of a big opportunity for her. Ofcourse her English was good; it was one of the qualifications you had to have in order to do an internship abroad, and compared to her own safe haven back in Norway, the USA seemed to be way more challenging.

The sound of a halting car made her look up. The driver who came out of the cab, looked at the young girl with hesitation. The young man awkwardly moved forward and looked at her. He dropped his gaze to the piece of paper in his hands and cleared his throat. "Uh, are you eh—Helena Elisabet Vilhjalmsson?" The boy stammered, while struggling with the last name. Helena giggled by hearing the funny pronunciation of her Norwegian name. "Why yes," she chuckled. "I am actually,—but just Helena is fine." she added quickly while receiving an embarrased look from the guy. He simply nodded and took her suitcase, while Helena sat own on the backseat of the car.

When the big building popped up in the distance, she tried to swallow the lump in her throat. Helena was always insecure about herself, but the fact that she was going to be in another country for 9 months made it even_ worse_. She wasn't sure how the people at the CDC would be; would they be welcoming towards her, or would they decry because of her being just a simple student?

The car stopped and the guy looked around. She opened the pocket of her jacket to get her wallet, but the guy held his hand up. "Someone already payed me. A guy from here. The one who ordered the taxi." he said with a slight smile around his lips. Helena nodded and smiled back to him. "Thank you." she said before opening the car door. The driver got out to get her suitcase.

When he left, she inhaled deeply and tried to calm her nerves. _You wanted this yourself. Quit being a sissy._

She walked towards the building, of which the gates where opened. Helena knew the gates would only close in case of a disease calamity. _Like that would ever happen,_ she chuckled in thought, knowing the CDC would never let something like that happen in the first place.

Behind the glass, there was a lady sitting behind the reception desk who would open the door for people. But the security guy in front of the building was blocking her way with his left hand. "Can I help ya?" he asked with a gentle yet cautionary tone in his voice. Helena forced herself to smile. "I'm the new intern from Norway. Helena Elisabet Vilhjalmsson." she explained to the man, who eyed her in confusion after hearing the Norwegian names. He grabbed the walkie talkie from his belt and began to talk to the person at the other side. Helena looked at the buildings around the CDC. _Probably some kind of university_, she pondered in thought.

The guy tapped on her shoulder and Helena turned around. "Ya can come in. Welcome to Atlanta 'n the CDC." he said with an actual smile this time, whom Helena returned. "Thank you."

The gates opened and she quickly walked inside while dragging her suitcase along. The chubby woman behind the desk looked up from her paperwork. She quickly got off her seat and waddled to Helena. "Hello, m' dear!" she exclaimed in enthusiasm. The woman took Helena's hand with her own hands and squeezed them gently. "Welcome ta Atlanta, love. I believe you're tha new intern?" she said, while Helena looked at the woman's blue and friendly eyes. Helena smiled and nodded. "I'm Helena," she introduced herself. The woman glimpsed at the heavy suitcase that Helena was carrying and she quickly grasped it out of her hands. "Shouldn' be carryin' tha heavy thang. I'll git someone ta take that downstairs. My name is Louise, by tha way. I wish we could talk som' more, but I believe ya two mentors are dyin' ta meet ya. If ya need anythin', I'm here every week day from eight 'til six." the woman rambled while she let go of her hand and gestured at the elevator in the hallway. She grabbed the suitcase from the ground and waddled back to her desk again. "Thank you," Helena said when she walked off towards the elevator.

Laboratory. She saw the words on the digital sign above the door and heard a feminine computer voice reading out the words as well.

The coolness welcomed her when she went out of the elevator. A young guy, probably around his thirties, waved at her. "Hi, I'm Steven. Sorry ta catch ya off guard like this, but I need ya ta get yer hair in a ponytail 'n wear a labcoat. Standard procedures." he said while pointing at the office next to him. Helena followed him inside. "I'm Helena." she said, while the guy gave her a labcoat and hair elastics. Helena frowned when he offered her the box of hair elastics, but she took one out anyway. When Steven noticed her questioning gaze, he grinned. "Ya not tha only one with long hair. Sometimes the women forget it, so we figured might s'well get a whole bunch of 'em."

Helena nodded and combed her hair in a ponytail. "Makes sense, I guess." she replied with a chuckle. Steven left the office and waited for her to follow him. "Yer mentors are waitin' for ya. Here, let me take ya to 'em." Steven murmered before locking up the office behind them.

They entered a large room that was filled with various equipments, but mostly computer screens. People were sitting behind them,; they typed things and looked at different images of the human body and cells. Some of them were clearly frustrated, as they slammed onto the keyboard. Helena forced back the laughter while she continued to follow Steve.

They stopped at a random desk, one that had several computers on it. A man with blonde hair around mid forties peeped up at them from behind the computer screen. He smiled and stood up. "Ah, you must be Helena. Sorry, don't really know how to pronounce the other magical names." he chuckled at her while he held out his hand. Helena shook the man's hand and grinned. "That's okay, I get that a lot. It's nice to finally meet you, dr.." she looked at him and tried to look for a name tag on his labcoat, but she couldn't fine one. "Dr. Jenner," he said with a smile. "Feel free to call me Edwin Jenner, though. Makes me feel less old." he added. Helena grinned in response.

"Well Edwin, why didn't you give me a call about our new intern."

The cheerful feminine voice interrupted their conversation and Helena looked at the woman who approached them. Edwin cleared his throat and pouted. "Ofcourse, how rude of me. Helena, this is my wife Candace." he said with a smile, while Candance grinned widly at him. Helena chuckled and held out her hand, though Candance pulled the girl in a hug. "Welcome to zone 5; your second home." she said while letting go of her. "We're gonna try to teach you a lot. We expect you to help us out a some times, but I think that won't be much of a problem, considering you want to learn new things." Candance said softly. Helena nodded enthusiastically. Suddenly, all the nerves were toned down, thanks to the welcoming people at the CDC. She truly felt like she was going to have a great time here, and she was excited to learn new things that actually interested her.

"Well, let's get started, shall we?"


	2. Chapter 2

The white labcoat was dancing around her curvy figure while she sprinted down the hallway. She heard the familiar sound of the coffee maker echo through the kitchen, and Helena quickened her pace even more.

For a slight moment she hesitated. Was he angry or something? She quickly managed to shake the thoughts off, before stepping forward. "Edwin?" she panted, while leaning against the door. Dr. Jenner turned around as if he didn't know what she was talking about. She shook her head. "Why?" she wondered with lack of understanding. Jenner squeezed his eyes together and grabbed the mug of coffee. It was so quiet, Helena could almost hear how the spoon fell into the dark liquid. Jenner stirred his coffee and brought the mug to his lips. Helena narrowed her eyes. "Why are you doing this? Why can't we just let them in?" she snapped while turning around. Jenner followed her towards the control room. "Vi, show security camera 1 to 5." she commanded. _"Now viewing security cameras 1 to 5_." confirmed a feminine voice. The big screen switched on and there they were, a group of stranger, desperation filling their aqueous eyes. Helena wanted to push the access button, but a firm hand stopped her. She met his eyes, who looked tired and frustrated at the same time. "Don't." he hissed, but after having to live together for 3 months, she wasn't afraid of the man. She had seen him at his worst when he was dealing with the death of his wife. Even Helena had a hard time with the mourning process, after she had been her pupil for almost 9 months.

Helena returned his glare. "Vi, turn on the sound of the security camera." she said mockingly. _"Now turning security camera volume on_." said the voice again in the background.

**_'—Please help us, we have women, children! No food, hardly any gas left!'_**

Jenner seemed to reconsider the options. The possibilty of letting them is was clearly crossing his mind, though he still pressed his lips together. Helena ran a hand through her ash brown hair and sighed. "_Please_." she pleaded, allowing herself to look as miserable as she could. Jenner sighed and finished his cup of steaming coffee. He shoved Helena towards the door. "Let's go."

_'We have no were else to go! If you don't let us in, you're** killing** us!'_

They ran towards the elevator. Jenner pressed the main floor button. As soon as the door opened, they ran towards the desk. Jenner grabbed a gun from behind the desk and Helena pushed the button. Jenner pushed her towards the wall. "Go." He grumbled while he was right behind her.

_'You're killing us! You're killing us!' _

Jenner slammed the access button on the right, while pushing Helena behind him. She peeped over his shoulder as the door opened, but as soon as the daylight filled the room he pushed her back again. When she wanted to tap him on the shoulder, he laid his finger on his lips, implying her to shut up. Helena nodded in return.

"Hello?" a male voice said, clearly hesitating about the whole situation they had gotten themselves into.

Jenner clicked the safety off the gun. He glanced around at Helena, who gave an encouraging nod.

"Anybody infected?" Jenner spoke firmly, while keeping his gun raised.

"One of our group was. He didn't make it."

Jenner took a few steps forward, but kept his gun raised. Helena obeyed her mentor and stayed behind the wall. "Why are you here? What do you want?" she heard Jenner ask, clearly still disagreeing with all of this.

She heard the stranger sighing before replying. "A chance."

"That's asking an awful lot these days," Jenner offered in response to the man, while taking another few steps forward.

Jenner was obviously still doubting whether to let them stay or not. Helena almost heard his thoughts echoing through the building and she almost thought he was going to send them away.

"You all submit to a blood test. That's the price of admission." he suddenly spoke. Helena smiled to herself. "We can do that," the voice said a little more cheerful than a few moments ago. _Hope_. They had hope again. The only thing Helena wanted, was to save people; she had been trying to work on a cure all this time with Jenner, yet they were unable to combine the right cells with the right biotics. Still; she had hope_. Hope that everything would be better_. Though she didn't exactly know what was going on outside, she presaged it wouldn't be any good. Nearly everyone had left the CDC to be with their families, but Helena had no choice than staying here; all the flights to her country were cancelled, and Candance and Edwin told her it wouldn't be a good idea to leave in this madness.

She missed her mother. Her father. _Her little sister_. But she had to stay, in order to survive. And so, she gave herself a new purpose; _create the cure_. There _had_ to be one.

But the fact that she and Edwin had unraveled the truth, about how everyone would turn in the end, whether that person had been bitten or not, scared her. It meant that no one could escape the awful fate of becoming one of those things when the time would come.

"You got stuff to bring in, you do it now. Once this door closes," Jenner nodded at the gate behind them, "It _stays_ closed."

She heard people leaving, probably to get their stuff, and Helena thought it was time to reveal herself. Even though she didn't know these people; she was curious and interested. After being locked up with the same person for _so_ long, human interaction had become a scarce thing. Sure, she had her books to keep her company, but in the end, every person needed to socialize. It was in a human's nature.

When she heard the footsteps return inside, she coughed. Jenner turned around and nodded.

"VI, seal the main entrance. Kill the power up here." Jenner said as the strangers shuffled forward. "Dr. Jenner," he introduced himself finally, still eyeing the group of strangers. Helena inhaled and walked towards Jenner. The group of people seemed to be taken aback by the sudden unexpected appearance. Helena smiled awkwardly. She wanted to say her name, but she was kind of frozen on the spot now that the group of people was actually standing before her. Jenner chuckled under his breath. "This is Helena," he said, nodding at the girl. "Hello," she snickered quietly. "Follow me to the elevators. We can't be up here once the power's off." Jenner said, almost giving the intention he was rescuing her from the awkward situation. He winked at her as they walked towards the elevators.

The elevator was suddenly filled with people. Helena felt kind of uncomfortable at first when she realised there were actually other _people_ inside the building. She glanced at the strange people. A woman with brown hair smiled at her, and Helena managed to pull off a smile as well. She caught an asian looking guy staring at her, but when she looked at him he looked away, with red cheeks.

"Doctors always go around packin' heat like that?" a raspy voice suddenly said, The southern accent caught her attention. It seemed ages ago since the last time she had heard an accent like that. A few months ago, when all the employees were stil here, she would hear it all the time.

The guy who had spoken was carrying a crossbow over his shoulder. "There were plenty left lying around," Jenner replied, "I familiarized myself." he looked at the people in the elevator. "But you look harmless enough. Except _you—" _he pointed at the boy standing in the middle. "I'll have to keep my eye on you." Jenner chuckled softly.

The guy with the southern accent caught her glance. He kept looking at her for a slight moment, before his eyes lowered to the ground.

A sudden _ding_ confirmed that they were at the right floor and the doors opened right after. The group looked around as they stepped into the white hallway. "Are we underground?"

Helena turned around and saw the woman, who had short gray hair, standing uncomfortable on the spot. "Are you claustrofobic?" Jenner asked in return. "A little," the woman admitted. "Try not to think about it." Jenner finally said, obviously not feeling compassionate towards the woman. Jenner continued to walk towards the control room, and Helena hesitated before stepping towards the woman, who had admitted to feel a little claustrofobic. "Hi, uhm—I've been claustrofobic before I got here, but my doctor gave me some breathing excercises and tips to occupy your mind. If you want, I can give them to you. I won't be needing them anyway." Helena softly said. The woman looked up at her in surprise and the little girl next to her looked at her with curiousity. The woman smiled. "Maybe, that'd be nice. I'll let you know. I'm Carol by the way, and this is Sophia." the woman smiled and gestured at the little girl. They walked next to each other as they followed Jenner. "I'm Helena," she replied in return. "It's nice to meet you. Hello, Sophia." she chuckled while waving briefly at the girl. The girl hesistated, but waved back eventually with a soft smile. "It's nice to meet you too, Helena. You have no idea how grateful we are." the woman breathed. When Helena looked at her, she could clearly see the suffer in her eyes. They were _survivors._

Suddenly, she felt even more urged to find a cure for all of this.


	3. Chapter 3

"Vi, bring up the lights in the big room." Jenner said when they entered the room. The computer screens and main screen turned on. "Welcome to Zone 5."

Helena turned around and sighed when she realised what the group was hoping to find. She could see how the relief in their eyes turned to disappointment, and she felt sorry for them.

"Where is everybody?" the man asked, whom Helena assumed to be the leader of the group, "the other doctors, the staff?"

Jenner seemed to be fighting a war in his mind while he was standing in the center of the room. "It's us. Just us here." he said calmly while nodding at Helena. She received a couple of curious yet sad glances and she quickly looked at the ground, wanting to avoid the looks as much as possible. The feeling of guilt was chewing her on the inside out.

"What about the person you were speaking with?" The woman asked, who had smiled to Helena earlier, "Vi?"

"Vi, say hello to our guests," Jenner said, "tell them – _welcome_."

The familiar feminine voice echoed through the room. "Hello guests,_ welcome_."

Helena saw their fear being confirmed, as some of them continued to stare defeated at the ground.

"I can take you all through here and into another room for the blood samples. Might as well get it over with." Jenner said, abruptly breaking into everyone's thoughts.

Helena and the group followed him to a different room, that had 4 chairs. Helena rushed over to a glass cabinet to prepare the needles and other necessary equipment.

"What's the point? If we were infected we'd all be running a fever." Helena rolled her eyes behind her back before turning around to face the group again. The blonde was sitting in one of the chairs, and Helena handed a syringe over to Jenner. He smiled at her and turned to the blonde. Jenner poked the syringe into the woman's arm before speaking. "I've already broken every rule in the book letting you in here." he replied. "Now, if you would be so kind to form a line." Jenner mumbled as he took out the syringe and put a bandage on the spot. The blonde woman grumbled and tried to stand up. Another woman moved forward to help her on her feet. The blonde's face suddenly turned pale. "Are you okay?" Jenner asked. The other woman answered. " She hasn't eaten in days. None of us have."

Jenner glanced at Helena, who nodded. He looked at the people standing in front of them, who where looking weak and starving. "Let's get ya'll something to eat then, huh?"

The mood suddenly changed. Helena smiled with satisfaction when they all seemed to feel quite happier. "But first, blood tests." Jenner added quickly with a chuckle.

The little boy sat down on the chair next to Helena. He shyly looked up at her "I don't like needles," he quickly said. Helena chuckled. "Me neither," she said softly before cleaning his arm with some alcohol. "What's your name?" she asked while putting a belt around his arm. "Carl," the boy replied, "you are.. Lena, right?" he asked hesitatingly. Helena smiled. "Helena, though if you want to call me Lena that's fine with me." she spoke. She grabbed the syringe. "So, where's your family?" she asked. The boy smiled and nodded at the leader. "That's my dad, his name is Rick. And over there is my mom Lori." he explained. Helena nodded and tried to remember the names. Lori was the woman who had smiled at her in the elevator. "So your daddy's a cop then, huh?" she wondered while she already knew the answer because of his uniform. The boy nodded proudly. "The best one. Though Shane is a good cop, too. He and my daddy were partners." the boy pointed at a man with brown hair, whom Helena assumed to be Shane.

"So, you're done Carl." Helena said with a grin while putting on a bandage. Carl looked at her in surprise. "How did you do that? I didn't even feel a_ thing_!'

Helena ruffled his hair. "Keeping you distracted. Now off you go." she teased. The boy smiled and got off the chair.

The next person was the guy with the southern accent. He glared at her while she cleaned his arm. "Afraid of needles?" she asked when she felt his arm stir underneath her touch. The man huffed. "No." he replied. Helena shrugged and put the belt around his arm. She already noticed that he didn't want to have a decent conversation with her. She took the syringe again. When she wanted to poke him, he tensed back into the chair. Helena waited and looked at him until he would return her glance. When he did, she smirked. "Wanna share your name?" she asked hesitating. The guy snorted in response. "Daryl."

She waited.

"Yer name's _Hell_-ona, right?" he scoffed. Helena rolled her eyes and poked the syringe in his arm. Daryl hissed in response. "No, though I have to admit that's _very_ creative." she replied while she shook her head. "Seems fittin' ta me, suckin' up people's blood like ya some kin' of vampire." he suddenly snapped. Helena startled and looked at him. "It's for research, thank you very much. I'm using the blood to find a cure." she explained calmly. Daryl snorted. "Yeah? How's that workin' out for ya?"

She didn't say anything when she pressed the bandage on the spot. He glared at her and got out of the chair.

"I don't really like needles,—" "—then I suggest you go to Helena. She has more experience with phobias than I do."

Lori sat down in her chair. "Hi," she smiled. Helena returned the smile. "Hello—Lori, isn't it?" she wondered while cleaning her arm. Lori snorted deeply from the nerves and nodded. "And you are Helena?"

Helena chuckled. "Yes. I was just talking to your son about you and your husband. Seems like you guys went through a lot." she said softly. Lori scoffed. "Oh, don't get me started about it. We're really relieved to be here. It's nice to be able to be somewhere, without having to put someone on watch." she chuckled sadly. Helena sighed. "I'm very sorry. I wish I could tell you '_I know the feeling_', but I honestly don't. I've been here all the time." she said to Lori, who had closed her eyes. "Don't you have any family?" Lori asked, quite shocked. Helena closed her eyes while the syringe sucked the blood out. "Well, yes. But I'm from Norway, you see. Haven't seen them since 1 year. I was supposed to head back about 3 months ago, 'til this stuff happened." she explained to Lori, who still had her eyes closed. Lori heaved a sigh. "I'm so sorry, dear."

Helena looked down. "It's okay. You're done, by the way."

Lori copied the same reaction as her son. She looked up at Helena in utter surprise. "That's some smart trick you did there," she grinned.


	4. Chapter 4

The mood had changed from tensed and scared to happy and relieved. Jenna scooped the spaghetti that she had made onto the plates and passed them to the guy named T-Dog, who put them on the table. Jenner had even given them some of the alcohol; some were drinking wine and some were drinking other booze.

Jenner sat at across the room, lost in his own thoughts. It seemed like something was bothering him. Helena took a plate and shuffled to where he sat. When she put down the plate in front of him, he looked up at her. He gave her a reassuring smile. "Thanks." he said with a nod. "Are you okay?" Helena asked with a quite worrisome undertone. Jenner nodded again. "Just tired," he lied, "what about you?" Helena looked at the people sitting around the table. "I'm alright, I guess. It's nice to have some new people here, but I guess I'm not very good with the whole socializing thing." she chuckled. Jenner grinned back at her. "Well, get some alcohol in there and you'll be good. Our protocol doesn't matter anymore anyway, might as well live it up a little." Jenner assured her, while gesturing at an empty glass on the counter. Jenna giggled. "Well, alright I guess."

"Ewww!"

She looked around and saw Carl with a nastily look on his face, shoving a glass of wine away from him. Helena laughed along with the others and grabbed the empty glass. When she wanted to grab the whiskey, she noticed it was gone. However, when she looked around, none other than Daryl held the half empty bottle in his hands. Helena walked over to him, while he was talking to the guy that she recalled Glenn. "Yer drinkin', little man. I wann' see how red ya face can get!" Daryl exclaimed like a child while he poured some whiskey into an empty glass. They laughed and Daryl turned around. Helena quickly took a few steps back and avoided his glance. "Somethin' ya wan' ask me, girl?" his voice rasped with his heavy Southern accent. Helena met his glare and scowled. "You're drinking my whiskey," she said calmly. The redneck raised his eyebrows at her and raised the bottle. He pointed at the bottle with a grin. Helena nodded. "Lil' girls 'r better off drinkin' lemonade, is what." Daryl smirked while teasingly tapping the bottle. Helena sighed and shook her head. She wanted to turn around, but the sudden grasp startled her. He had grabbed her glass and poured it full. "Jesus, don't!—_God_. Half a glass would have been good enough, you know." Helena said while taking the glass from him. Daryl grinned. "Thought doctors weren' s'pposed ta drink in tha first place?" he chuckled darkly while leaning against the wall. Helena rolled her eyes. "I'm not a doctor, I'm a scientist. Besides, it's not like I'm gonna perform brain surgery anytime soon." she fired back while lifting the glass to her lips.

"It seems like we haven't properly thanked our host," the sudden voice from Rick said. Helena looked at the man who had just stood up. Jenner smiled awkwardly and pointed at Helena. "Actually, this girl talked me into it. Not gonna take all the credit." He chuckled when he and Helena exchanged looks. She blushed and looked away shyly to avoid all the looks. "To both our hosts, then." T-Dog said while raising his glass. She startled when the loud voice behind her yelled 'booyah!', but she managed to smile and raised her glass as well. "So, when are you going to tell us what the hell happened here, doc? All the other doctors who are supposed to figure out what's going on, where are they?"

The sudden question coming from Shane caused the happy talking and laughter to die away.

"Shane, we are celebrating, no need to do this now." Rick snapped back to him, seeming quite frustrated by his friend who managed to ruin the positive atmosphere in the room in less than 2 minutes. "This is why we're here, ain't it? This was _your_ move, to come here to find all the answers. Instead, we found_ them_. Just_ two_ people. Why?" Shane insisted, while looking at Jenner with a judging look. Helena clenched the glass in her hands and shook her head in frustration. _Give the man a goddamn break_, she wanted to scream. She had already been happy by the fact that he let these people in in the first place.

But when she looked at Jenner, he just shrugged while holding a bottle of wine. "When things got bad, a lot of people just left to be with their families. When things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted." he explained while he tapped quietly on the bottle of wine.

"_Every_ last one?" Shane asked in disbelief. The others were now their paying their full attention to Jenner as well. "No. Some couldn't face walking out those doors. They.." Jenner paused and looked at Helena, trying to find the right words to describe the nightmare they had experienced back then, "_opted_ out. There was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time." Jenner sipped from his wine and looked down at his hands. "But you guys didn't leave.. Why?" Helena looked at Andrea, who looked back at them with a curious expression. Helena sighed as Jenner tried to search for her eyes. He looked at Andrea then and smiled. "Just kept working. Hoping to do some good. We still had hope left, despite all the people leaving." he spoke softly.

"Dude, you are_ such_ a buzz kill man," Glenn mumered. Some laughed quietly and Helena grinned as well. Images from the suicides were flowing through her mind, and Helena gulped down the whiskey down, hoping the burning feeling would erase the memories. She felt the surprised gaze from the redneck behind her, but she refused to turn around.

"I'll show you where you all can sleep." Jenner said while standing up. The group followed him and their laughter and talking died away when they walked down the hallway, leaving Helena behind. She sat down on a chair and sighed, letting her hands run through her hair. The full bottle of wine caught her attention, but she sulked and shook her head. She stood up and walked to the kitchen, hoping to find another bottle of Scotch. _Might as well follow his advice and get drunk,_ she pondered, while opening several cupboards and cabinets.

Her laughter echoed through the room when she found 3 bottles of Scotch, and she grabbed one eagerly. She walked back to the table again and sat down after she grabbed the notebook out of her labcoat. _Why am I still even wearing this thing,_ she mocked to herself, while taking off the coat.

A few minutes later, while Helena was writing something in her notebook and occasionally sipping from her glass of whiskey, she heard footsteps approaching her. She looked up and realised it was Jenner. He sat down opposite of her while he tried to control the grin that was hanging around his lips. Helena looked at him in question, but already knew. "Told them about the showers then?" she asked while returning her attention back to the notebook again. Jenner chuckled. "Indeed. Told them to go easy on the hot water, though I doubt if that will happen." he said. Helena shrugged. "We're clean enough, unlike them," she gave a teasing disgusted look, "they deserve _all_ the hot water in the world."

Jenner smiled. "Well, I'm gonna call it a night. See you tomorrow." he said when he stood up and smiled at her once last time. Helena grinned. "Goodnight," she replied while he turned around, leaving her behind. Helena sighed and finished the glass of whiskey. She stood up as well, and made her way down the hall towards her own room.


	5. Chapter 5

**[A/N] - Please read this, my lovely readers.**

I'm so sorry that I haven't updated in a while! I will update more often from now on.

This chapter is mainly about Helena's internship and the story behind it. Not much Daryl, but I promise there will be more Darylena (omg their ship name omg im freaking out rn) in the next following chapters.

I loved writing this chapter. Loved loved loved it. The friendship of Edwin and Helena is beautiful and this chapter will truly show that. They are both desperate and they both lost people. Not to mention, they sticked with eachother until the very end.

Okay, that's it I guess. If you love the friendship between Jenner and Helena just as I do, you're going to like it. And you probably wanna get some kleenex, because you will cry and hate me forever.

* * *

_**|| N**ote: the italic parts are flashbacks. This chapter will alternate between the **presence** and **past**. ||  
_

* * *

"I wish you would have told me."

"Why did it take you this long to figure it out? For God sakes Lena, you're _smarter_ than this. Don't pretend like you didn't have a clue."

Staying calm seemed surprisingly easy, considering the circumstances they were currently in.

Helena tried to breathe properly, to prevent herself from becoming lightheaded. Jenner was wearing his labcoat and sitting in his office chair, while he clutched the photograph of Candace between his hands. The woman smiled at Jenner, as if she was still in the room somehow.

Helena massaged her temples with her finger tips. She laid a hand on his shoulder and nodded at the picture. "This isn't what she would have wanted, Edwin." she spoke softly. Edwin turned around to look at her and shook his head. "It should have been me," he said, "it should be her sitting here."

Helena shook her head. "No, that's not true. You're _supposed_ to be here. Everything happens for a reason."

* * *

_When she opened her eyes the next morning, her head was slightly throbbing. Helena glanced at her nightstand and noticed the half empty bottle of whiskey. She remembered yesterday and moaned in protest. Luckily she could handle a lot of alcohol before having an actual hangover, so when she got up and drank some water, she already felt better.  
_  
_After she had showered and changed into new clothes, she made her way towards the kitchen. It took her a moment before she realized the lights were slightly dimmed. Or maybe she was just imagining things thanks to the amount of alcohol in her blood.  
_  
_Helena stepped into the kitchen and smiled at the sight of the full table. Everyone was eating breakfast, and she noticed how some of them were clearly hungover. Helena chuckled before pouring some tea into a mug. She stood behind the counter and watched the people eat with joy. The sudden sound of clattering metal startled her, and when she looked around she saw T-dog holding a pan filled with eggs. "Looks like you could use some breakfast." he chuckled, while he grabbed a plate with his free hand. "Yeah, good idea. It's nice to have someone make breakfast for you." she chuckled as T-dog shoved some scrambled eggs and bacon onto a plate. "Thanks." she said with a smile. T-dog winked and continued to make eggs.  
_  
_She sat down in the corner at a seperate table when Jenner walked in. There was some commotion about the guy named Shane, because he had scratches on his face.  
_

* * *

"What does tha' mean?"

Her body was numb and her tongue had a weird feeling. She couldn't say it. She just couldn't.

The nerves started to take control of her body.

"Tell me, lil' _girl_, I know ya know tha answer. Best 'f ya jus' tell me tha truth, or we gon' do it my way, and _that_ ain't gon' be pretty."

Helena looked at Daryl. She opened her mouth, though no word came out. The salty liquid stung behind her eyes.

"Vi, define." Jenner said somewhere in the distance.  
Daryl stared into her icy blue eyes and his expression softened.  
He already knew the answer.

"HIT's, high impulse thermobaric consists of a two stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast _wave_ of significantly greater power and duration than _any_ other known explosive except nuclear.  
The vacuum pressure ignites the oxygen between five thousand and six thousand degrees and is useful when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired."

"Sets the air on fire."

Daryl gave her a disgusted look. "I'm so sorry." Helena whispered, her eyes filled with tears.

"No pain.. And end to sorrow, grief, regret.. Everything."

* * *

_Words were unable to describe how stupid she felt. Dale smiled at her and waited for her to answer his question. Helena squeezed her eyes and stared at the digital clock, as if it were her enemy. The red numbers stirred up a weird feeling in her stomach. "I-I don't know. I seriously don't." Helena said nervously. Dale smiled and patted her shoulder. "Don't worry about it. But just.. Could you.. Maybe ask him about it?"  
_  
_Helena nodded and smiled. "Ofcourse." she replied. Dale offered her one last thankful smile before he returned to the others. Helena stayed in the big room and waited for Edwin to return with his coffee. It almost seemed like an eternity before she saw him enter the room.  
_  
_She wanted to ask him so badly, but when she saw the group follow him, she closed her mouth_ _abruptly__. The weird instinctive feeling inside her, that was expecting the worst answer possible, was enough reason not to ask him in front of everyone. These people had come so far, and the idea of.. She couldn't. As she watched how Edwin readied the computer and asked Vi to show the scan, she tried to calm herself down.  
_  
_"Helena, the stage is yours."  
_  
_The doom scenarios stopped abruptly when she heard Jenner call her name._  
_"Uh, what?"_  
_The group looked at her, waiting for her to answer. They looked somewhat hopeful._  
_"I uh-don't know any songs?" she answered sheepish.  
_  
_Jenner grinned and shook his head. "These people here don't know what a synapse is, so if you would like to explain. Just like we,—" he paused._ _"—Just like I taught you."  
_  
_Helena noticed the painful look in his eyes. She nodded and walked to the front of the room. **I hate presentations and lectures,** she complained in thought as she nervously plucked her nails. Jenner chuckled quietly and gestured to the screen. Helena turned around and her mouth changed into an 'O' when she realized what he meant.  
_  
_"—Right. Okay. Synapse." she started nervously.  
_  
_"Basically, they are these things that play a part in saving and restoring your memory."  
_  
_Helena looked at Jenner for feedback, and he gave her a look that clearly said 'you can do way better than that'. She knew he were right; she had probably given around 40 lectures to the employees on their department in total, during her stay. Even though she hated giving lectures, it had been a part of her internship and she had to get marks for the presentational assignments. It was all part of developing her skills.  
_  
_But this was different. It felt like the digital clock stared mockingly at her._  
_She decided to tried again anyhow.  
_  
_"Experiences and memories. They are the things that makes us unique as human beings. It's that what makes us different from one another."  
_  
_Helena paused.  
_  
_"It can sometimes change, as in it would feel different, after a long-time depression. Like we only see some parts. Mostly just parts we only wish to see. Ofcourse, it doesn't actually change."  
_  
_She nodded and returned to her working spot. Jenner gave her a look of approval, and she knew what he'd say.  
_  
**_I'm proud of you  
_**

* * *

"Please don't do this. Open the door." she begged as she grasped his hand. "_Don't_. Two months ago, you gave me this whole lecture about hope. About how there's still a chance. I _believed_ in you. _You_ made me believe in you. You _convinced_ me, to sacrifice my life if I _really_ had to, in order to find a solution to this Godforsaken mess!"

Helena tried to ignore the tears rolling down her cheek and continued to stare into his eyes. It almost seemed like he was lost. _This was it,_ she thought. _The thing I was most afraid of._ Edwin _losing it because of losing Candace. Like a ticking timebomb.  
_  
"You _know_ there's no hope. You _damn_ well know I had to lie. Helena, you're twenty-six years old. I couldn't tell you the truth. Your life has just begun." Edwin said coolly.

"Then don't you fucking _dare_ to take that away from me! Don't you _dare_ make this decision!" she screamed in response.

Edwin pressed his lips together. Helena could feel the shocked looks from the people behind her. But she ignored them. She only heard the sobs of Carol and Sophia, and her heart broke. _Like it wasn't fragile enough already,_ she scoffed in thought.

Jenner grabbed her hands and pulled her to him. Daryl and Rick, who stood behind Edwin, wanted to stop him but Helena shook her head implying she had it under control. Edwin removed the hair that was covering her ear. "You know it's in the air. Don't forget that. Never forget that." he whispered. Helena nodded and bit her lower lip. Edwin turned around and motioned for Rick to come, and he told him the same thing. Helena didn't pay attention. She felt the what seemed to be worrisome glance of the hunter rest on her, but she didn't turn around.  
Before she realized what was happening, the gates opened.

"Come on!" Daryl yelled. Helena looked at the digital clock. _Six and a half minute.  
_  
The group left, except for Jacqui, Dale and Andrea. As soon as Rick left, Edwin grabbed Helena's hand. "Go." he urged. Helena shook her head. "Please come with us. I can't lose you too, I don't have anyone left. No family.. _Nothing_. You're everything I've got." she said while here cheeks wetted. Edwin smiled. "I can't go on and you _know_ why. But you can. I lied earlier, about hope. There is no hope.. But you create your _own_ hope if you really want to."

Edwin grabbed the envelope out of his labcoat and handed it over to Helena. She opened it.

There were 4 photos in it. The first one was a group photo of the CDC labatory and research department. The second one was of Edwin and Candace dressed chic, standing in front of the CDC during an open night. The third one was of Helena and Steven pulling weird faces in front of the camera during a lunch break.

The last one made her cry even more.

It was a picture of Candace, Jenner and Helena in the lab. The three of them had their coats on, and their safety glasses were on the top of their heads. They smiled. Before everything went to shit. They looked happy and carefree. Candace and Jenner had their arm wrapped around Helena's shoulder. They looked proud. _Satisfied_ with their lives.

But there were more things in the envelope. Her school internship report, with marks and all. She had never seen her marks before.

Jenner's CDC pass was in it. When she saw another pass with her picture on it, she gasped for air. Up until now, she always had a long-visiting pass, but the fact that he had gotten her own pass could only mean one thing; before the world had gone to shit, they wanted to offer her a job.

The last thing inside the envelope, was something only Edwin and Helena could understand. It was a drawing***** of a weird and obviously failed cat.

"Thank you." Helena whispered as she looked up. Edwin laid a hand on her shoulder and smiled. He wiped away a tear from her cheek with his sleeve and gestured at the gate. "Go."

* * *

_Helena wandered into her room and grabbed her bag. She knew she couldn't bring her suitcase if she had to, so she had to leave some stuff behind. The packing went quicker than she had expected, and she had packed the most necessary things, along with some summer and winters clothing. After she had grabbed some of her favourite books as well, she went to Jenner's office.  
_  
_It almost seemed ridiculous; the fact that she suddenly felt unsafe somehow frightened her. Would Jenner ever do such a thing as self destructing the whole damn building? Why was she suddenly thinking about this? Her overthinking even caused her to pack her things, which was something she hoped she would never have to do. No, in her opinion, leaving was pathetic. Sometimes she felt so close to generating a cure, yet so far away. But she always had hope._  
_She knocked on the door, but opened it anyway without waiting for his response. Jenner turned around and she noticed the envelope in his hands. He quickly tucked it in the pocket of his labcoat and Helena frowned in question. What was he hiding from her?_  
_"What happens when the clock hits zero?"_  
_Edwin sighed. "So you figured it out, didn't you?" he scoffed, as he examined the worrisome look on her face. Helena pursed her lips together.  
_  
**_"I wish you would have told me."_**

* * *

*****6 months ago, the CDC was asked to do a presentation at a elementary school. Helena and Edwin didn't get along with the children, because the only thing the children did was shout, so Helena asked the kids if they wanted to see a magic trick. Helena told the kids she was going to conjure a cat on paper. She didn't mention that she absolutely sucked at drawing. The kids ended up silent and Edwin and Helena laughed for about 10 minutes. 


	6. Chapter 6

The more steps she took, the more nervous she felt. The adrenaline seemed to boil its way through her veins while her legs automatically carried her to her room. Once she reached the hallway with her room, she grabbed the bag. When she had packed it, she had already put it outside, so it'd be easier to take with her.

She continued to run towards the exit. Would she make it? Images of the CDC blowing up, with _her_ locked in it, caused her to shriek.

"Helena?!"

She almost bumped into someone when she rounded the corner. It were Dale and Andrea. Helena only nodded and the three of them continued to run outside. Her heart thumped in her throat.

"Where is the exit?!"

Helena looked at Dale. "Fuck!" she screamed. She then noticed the broken glass and pointed at it. Dale nodded and they ran towards it as fast as they could.

She tried not to cry when she felt the rays of sunshine kiss her pale white skin. Helena saw the blue air. _It's more blue than I remember,_ she thought.

They ran, as far as they could and as fast as they could. Neither of them knew how much time they had left. It were only seconds, yet it felt like an eternity.

"GET DOWN!"

Dale and Andrea ducked behind what seemed to be a bunker. Helena looked around, confused and panicked. She threw her bag near Dale and Andrea. _What do I do?_ she thought nervously.

**_Hide, you idiot!_**

"Helena!" A voice screamed, that she couldn't recognize.

Suddenly, someone pulled her down. A loud explosion occured and the warmth came right after. The building, that pretty much had become a new home to her, caught fire. More explosions followed and Helena covered her ears. The ashes filled her mouth and she let go of one ear to cover her mouth.

After 10 minutes, everything went quiet. It was almost like the birds were chirping on purpose.

Helena glanced next to her and saw Dale. He was the one who had pulled her down. Helena tried to smile, but she stood up right away to look at the building.

Nothing, besides the smoldering evidence of the building that once stood there. Helena started to cry. The sobs were uncontrollable and she wanted to puke. _Edwin Jenner died_. The only prove of the happiness she had experienced and she things she had learned these past few months.

_Gone._ She had no one, besides these people she didn't even know.

Strong hands pulled her towards a car, but Helena tried to fight back. "Don't touch me! Don't, _please_."

"We need to go, Helena. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

When she heard the voice from Rick, she relaxed. The fact that Jenner had told him the secret made her calm down, knowing Jenner had trusted him for a reason. Helena nodded and allowed Rick to drag her along with him. The world outside seemed to be shut down; she didn't realize what was happening. The only thing she knew what was happening, was how she was lifted into the car seat by a strong pair of arms and a voice in the distance saying "_Yer a tough sumbitch for a lab-missy_."

The engine started and they drove away. Helena turned around to look at the remains of the building one last time. The lump in her throat only seem to grew bigger at the sight. Helena sighed and buried her face in her hands, allowing the salty liquid to escape out of the corner of her eyes. _For Godsake Helena, you're 26, get you're shit together,_ she said to herself even though it sounded unconvincing.

When the car stopped and the doors opened, Helena got out. They had stopped in some rich neighbourhood. It honestly didn't matter to Helena.

"Thank God we're outta there, tha man was nuts."

Helena tried to ignore Daryl. _He doesn't know him,_ she said to herself to stay calm.

"Daryl's right—we can't risk runnin' into another moron like tha' Jenner guy." Shane said casually. Helena grinded her teeth. "Shut up." she growled, causing everyone to look at her in surprise. Shane smirked and shook his head. "He was fuckin' crazy. Better hope ya ain't like him or _you_ and I 'r gonna have some problems."

Helena threw herself on him. "Asshole!" she growled, while she started to throw punches at him. She managed to hit him on the nose, before a strong pair of arms caught her and pulled her backwards. "Let me go!" she yelled, while trying to break free. Dale wanted to help Shane up his feet, but Shane growled and stood up by himself. "Both of you, stop. Shane, keep your mouth shut and Helena calm down. Fighting isn't going to achieve anything." Rick said, while he glared daggers at Shane. Helena snorted and turned around to fetch her bag out of the car. Everyone went to their cars to grab their stuff.

"Wha' d'ya think yer doin'?"

Helena turned around and looked at Daryl. "What does it looks like I'm doing?" she snapped, while she put down the bag on the pavement. Daryl rolled his eyes. "We still need ta clear tha house, smarty pants." he fired back as he readied his crossbow. Helena gestured at the house. "Go on then. I ain't stopping you."

Daryl scowled and turned around, but stopped in his tracks when Helena insulted him in Norwegian. "Ya got somethin' ya wanna say ta me, Pippi Longstockin'?" he exclaimed offended. Helena returned the angry glare and raised her eyebrows. "I don't know, you tell me. You obviously had problems with Jenner, so why not with me?"

The hunter smirked mockingly. "Did I say I ain't got problems with ya? Yer that full of yerself, huh? Jus' 'cuz yer some smart ass scientist don' mean shit, lady. Now shut yer rude ass mouth 'n quit playin' games. Be a lil' grateful for once in yer life." Daryl said as he pointed in her face. Helena narrowed her eyes at him. "You don't know shit about me, _asshole_. Don't pretend you do."


	7. Chapter 7

The following days were quiet. Helena had distanced herself from the group and only came out of her hiding when she really had to. The small library and office, that was in the back of the house, had become her new safe spot. Some of the group had attempted to talk to her, but Helena barely replied to them. After a while, they all realized it was pointless, and so they left her alone.

When she wasn't busy writing about her thoughts, feelings and experiences, she would read until her eyelids grew heavy. It seemed to be the only escape, of not having to think about the fact that dead people were roaming the earth.

The curtains were closed and Helena was reading a copy of '_To Kill a Mockingbird_' when the door opened ajar behind her. Helena didn't bother to turn around. "Sweety, you really should eat something." Carol softly spoke. The tension disappeared when she heard the womans voice. Carol was the only one who didn't get on her nerves. Helena turned around and closed her book. She sighed and stood up. "I guess so." she agreed as she tried to smile at Carol.

All eyes were on her once she stepped inside the living room. Helena looked down, trying to hide the embarrasment and the uncomfortable feeling she got from being in the focus of attention. The group continued to chatter as she sat down next to Lori. The brown haired woman turned to her. "Oh my god honey, you look so pale. Here, eat something." Lori said as she offered her a plate of rice and veggies. Helena offered a weak smile in response and began to eat her meal. While she was devouring her veggies, she heard Rick and Daryl argue in the hallway. Daryl was clearly disagreeing with something.

She had just finished her food when Daryl appeared before her. "Let's go Pippi, we goin' out." he growled. An uneasy feeling crept up to her stomach and she looked at him, confused. "What?" she asked, wondering whether she had been mishearing things or not. Daryl grinded his teeth. "Do I need ta repeat it for ya? Maybe translate it to that thing ya call yer language?! C'mon, I ain't got all day." he grumbled as he grabbed a leather jacket from the hallway. Helena stood up and exchanged looks with T-dog, who shrugged in repsonse to her unspoken question. "Maybe you should tone it down a little." Carol tried, though Daryl glared daggers at her. "Why don'tcha just shut yer mouth, huh?"

Daryl threw her the leather jacket, grabbed his backpack and stormed outside. Helena followed him.

When they were in the woods, Helena caught up to Daryl and sighed. "Why am I here?" she tried quietly. Daryl halted and glared at her. "Rick thinks ya need ta learn 'bout survival." he explained rougly. Helena bit her lower lip and snorted. "Let me guess, he gave you the dirty job?" she mumbled mockingly. The answer she received mas nothing more than a loud sigh. "From now, shut up 'less I tell ya ta talk, alrigh'?"

The girl rolled her eyes. Daryl turned around and Helena rambled something in Norwegian. Suddenly she was pinned against the nearest tree. "Ya really gotta stop tha'. We're in America, tha' meanin', you's speakin' English." he said threateningly. Helena nodded blankly and Daryl let go of her.

They spent the rest of the day in the woods. Daryl taught her how to track and tomorrow he was going to teach her about using a weapon.

Night came sooner than they had expected. The small campfire provided them with warmth and a squirrel hung above the fire on a stick. Daryl and Helena had just finished setting up their tent.

The sound of her pencil on the paper put her mind at easy. She had written down the research data in the CDC, and she was trying to solve the puzzle with the remaining cells.

"Why 'r ya doin' tha'?"

His voice interrupted the calm silence. Helena looked up and met Daryl's glance. "Why am I doing what?" she repeated with a chuckle. Daryl smirked and shook his head. "Why 'r ya still tryin' ta fix this whole_ Godforsaken_ mess? It's not like anythin' will change." he explained as he looked into the flames. Helena smiled and stood up. Daryl looked at her in confusion when she grabbed her notepad and pencil. She walked over to Daryl and sat down next to him. He raised his eyebrows, though he waited for her to speak. "See this?" Helena wondered, while pointing at a drawing of the human cell system. He looked at the drawing and made sound in the back of his throat as a confirmation.

Helena met his gaze. "I'm _that_ close to finding a possible solution. That's why I'm going to fix this whole _Godforsaken_ mess."

The expression in his eyes somehow changed to admiration.


End file.
